The video for "Smashing Time" arrived from the States, and - some boring slapstick scenes aside - it were bloomin' great. And, astonishingly, some of the satire seems more relevant to today than ever.

There's a good article about the film to be found here.

I've just finished reading a truly horrific account of what it was like to be a contestant on "Changing Rooms". Read it and weep. Link via dollsoup (he's started his own blog now).

www.engrish.com
Love it!

Link via Groc.

Chig's 2001 fiendish pop quiz.

1) Ignoring brackets, which name reached #1 in 1999 as a song title, and then in 2001 as the name of an artist?

2) What is the connection between the memberships of Feeder and S Club 7?

3) Which megastar sold 954 copies of his third solo album on its day of release, on the same day that Robbie Williams sold 74,000 of Swing When You’re Winning?

4) Why would Hear’say fans have had to buy THREE albums in 2001 to get all the tracks they released on albums? (NB. It’s nothing to do with import versions of albums.)

5) What was the biggest selling album in America in 2001? (Correct up to 31/10/01, just in case the Music For Heroes 11th September tribute album has now outsold it. That's not the answer I'm looking for.)

6) It sounds like Kelis has something in common with The Charlatans and Erasure. What is it?

7) Which two people topped the singles chart in 2000 and again in 2001, but under different names each time?

8) What did these 2001 single releases have in common?
Five ‘Rock The Party’
Robbie Williams ‘Let Love Be Your Energy’
Limp Bizkit ‘Boiler’
Steps ‘Words Are Not Enough’

9) What’s the connection between the names of Oasis and 2001 double chart-toppers Blue?

10) What do the following groups all have in common?
Vanda Vanda
Bardot
Skandal Us

11) All of these acts had TWO #1 singles in the UK in 2001, EXCEPT which one?:

Shaggy, Atomic Kitten, Hear’say, Westlife, Blue, Kylie, S Club 7, Robbie Williams

12) Sex and violence are obviously not allowed in the squeaky clean worlds of Steps, allSTARS and er, David Gray, so they censored their own lyrics. All three of them released covers of 1980s hits in 2001, and all three ludicrously changed a line in their remakes. What was the original lyric in each case?

(a) "You make me tremble when your hand moves lower. You taste a little then you follow slower."
(Steps – Chain Reaction)

(b) "Don’t say you’re easy on me; you’re about as easy as you were before"
(allSTARS – Is There Something I Should Know?)

(c) "You were a runaround, a lost and found, and not for me I fear. "
(David Gray – Say Hello Wave Goodbye)

13) Loads of acts released greatest hits compilations at the end of 2001, but what distinguishes those from Andrew Lloyd-Webber, Perry Como and Steps from most of the others?

14) Hear’say won Popstars, and Estonia won Eurovision. What’s the direct connection between Hear’say and Eurovision 2001?

15) Name every Australian to reach #1 in the UK singles chart in 2001.

16) Which group is the odd one out?
(a) All Saints
(b) Savage Garden
(c) Aqua
(d) Five
(e) Backstreet Boys

17) Only one act in the Top Ten singles of 2000 has also managed to get a single in the Top Ten of 2001.
(a) Who?
(b) What are the two singles?

18) Which song reached #1 in 1999 and again in 2001, for a different act?

19) Only Steps and Cliff Richard did it in 1999, only Bob The Builder did it in 2000, and only DJ Otzi did it in 2001. Did what exactly?

20) Who attempted to enter the chart at #1 and #2 by releasing two singles on the same day in February, but only managed to enter at #8 and #9?

21) Which indie band had tried the above trick in 1994, only reaching #52 and #60, before they had some much bigger hits at the height of Britpop?

22) Both of these 2001 albums were called something entirely different until moments before release (even being reviewed in magazines under their previous titles):

Kingsize (Five)
We Love Life (Pulp).

(a) What were they originally called?
(b) What was the official reason given for each change?

23) On a similar note, which band toured with a song called ‘Daniel’s Saving Grace’, long before releasing it as a single in 2001, and what did the title become on release?

24) Victoria Beckham’s self-titled debut album and Kylie’s ‘Fever’ were both released on the same day, in the ‘titanic chart battle’ that never happened. How many new albums eventually entered the chart higher than Victoria Beckham’s in that first week?

25) All these people had #1 singles in 2001. This is how they’re known to their mothers, but how are they known to music fans?

Joseph Foreman
Richard Breen
Orville Burrell
Jason Brown

Albums of the year now annotated. Whee!

Ooh, John Peel's Festive Fifty has sound clips of all this year's featured choons. Now that's a neat idea.

I see there is still some slight overlap with my own choices: Hotel Yorba, Last Nite, Crystal, Sunrise and My Red Hot Car are all in the Peel 20 and on my "Year In Song" cdr collection. But who are Melys, at Number One with something called "Chinese Whispers"?

Aha, I see that Tanya Headon's I Hate Music is back in business - and my word, does she have something to say about my favourite album of 2001...
(It's the entry for January 02 - Tanya's current bookmark links being all shot to bits at present).

Graudates of the noble establishment of St. Custard's should also take a look at what Tanya has to say about the Cocteau Twins.

The Lord Of The Rings

About two minutes into the film, I suddenly remembered why I gave up on The Hobbit all those years ago. Just under an hour into the film, I could stand no more and left the cinema.

There’s something crucial missing from Tolkien for me, and I’m not altogether sure what it is. But it has something to do with characterisation, plot, pace and emotional interest (oh, that would be everything, then).

Anyhow, the net result was that I found it impossible to sustain any concentration on what was going on (no matter how pretty it all looked on screen).

Can anyone explain to me what they like about either the books or the film? Because I’m totally baffled.

It was only recently, after a couple of months of carefree bloggery, that I discovered that in some quarters, there is quite a perceived pecking order to this whole blogging business. There are blogging awards - presumably hotly contested, and no doubt conferring great kudos. There are A-list bloggers, with attendant personality cults, acolytes, wannabes and detractors. Getting a link from one of these A-listers is considered to be a great honour.

Judging by the number of comments she receives, something tells me that Meg of not.so.soft >> life.unfolding is one of these A-listers. But you know what? She deserves to be. For hers is one of the best blogs I've found to date.

So here's another gratuitous, apsirational, wannabe link to her site. Gee, maybe she'll notice me. B-list, here I come!

As I approach the ripe old age of forty (46 days to go, and counting), I realise that there are some qualities which I shall never possess. For instance:

1. The ability to be civil for the first hour of the day.
2. Effective hand-to-eye co-ordination.
3. A golden singing voice.
4. Tact.
5. Consistency.
6. Self-discipline.
7. Great physical strength.
8. Culinary prowess.
9. A love of opera.
10. A basic understanding of the mechanical world.

And really, that's quite OK. I love me just the way I am.
Does that sound awful? Well, I don't think it should; self-acceptance is a hard won state of mind.
But, give or take the odd wobble, I think I'm more or less there now.
Phew.

Traditionally, our New Year’s Eves have ranged from brilliant to awful, and all points in between. Thankfully, this year’s was a good ‘un.

K’s sister and her boyfriend came over to the cottage, for their first “proper” visit since we’ve been there (shamefully). We started with Bolly, then Roederer. K cooked pea and ham soup, and a beef stew (more exotic than it sounds). Pudding consisted of dunking cantucci into cocktail glasses filled with vin santo (thanks to my aunt and uncle, who excelled themselves on the pressie front this year).

Around 10 o’clock, we cabbed it over to The Gate at Brassington, which over the past year has become our favourite pub in the whole wide world. It was packed, but there was still room enough. K’s sister and bf aren’t generally big on pubs, but they loved this place (and so would you – there’s something about it, especially during the festive season, that can only be described as magical).

We started reminiscing about our club-going pasts. K’s sister was a regular at the legendary Shelley’s in Stoke back in the early 90s, where a then unknown DJ called Sasha was the resident. Her bf is a veteran of the Manchester club scene, who used to large it up and down the country back in the day (he even went to the notorious FF once, which is no mean achievement for a straight guy!). And my own days as a fully fledged Tradebabe are already a matter of record. But here we all were in a cosy country pub, all agreeing that we wouldn’t want to be anywhere else. How times change.

At five to twelve, the landlord ordered everyone outside on the street, glasses in hand, and locked the doors of the pub behind him. The entire pub formed a giant circle for Auld Lang Syne as the church bells pealed (they’d clearly got the campanologists in). The landlord and staff of The Gate then put on a firework display, with the snow covered hills behind as a backdrop. They were fireworks of the expensive, spectacular kind, and they went on, and on, and on. In fact, they were still going strong half an hour later when the return cab turned up. This was all a complete surprise to us, and all the more enjoyable for it.

Back to the cottage, armagnac, drunken bollocks conversation (I was something of a comedy drunk by then), bed around 2am. New Year’s Day hangover at a perfectly acceptable level, though K really, really suffered all the way through the day, the poor lamb.

Yup, result. On past experience, this probably means that next year’s NYE will be total crap, but let’s not dwell on that now…

DYMBEL! LOOK AWAY NOW!

1 ryan adams - gold
call it trad dad retro rock if you must, and sure it’s derivative as hell, but - like oasis in their glory days – ryan’s happy to wear his influences on his sleeve, and he transcends them magnificently.

2 charlatans - wonderland
their best yet – classic rawk swagger, in which timmy discovers falsetto and drops the angst.

3 super furry animals - rings around the world
vastly ambitious, endlessly inventive, never a dull moment: a “pet sounds” for the new millennium.

4 dolly parton - little sparrow
abandoning the nashville rhinestones, getting back to her bluegrass roots, and revealing her true vocal talent.

5 spacek - curvatia
moody mix of d’angelo style funk with downbeat electronica, which takes a few listens before worming its way into your skull – perfect weekend morning music (but be warned: it needs a decent hi-fi to avoid sounding muddy).

6 basement jaxx – rooty
more consistent than “remedy”, though maybe lacking its highlights – a whole heap of eclectic fun in a crisis year for dance.

7 whiskeytown – pneumonia
the “other” ryan adams album this year (though “heartbreaker” would have been album of the year if it hadn’t been released in 2000).

8 alicia keys - songs in a minor
took a long time to get into this one, but it’s the classiest soul collection of the year, from “a major new talent” (hopefully).

9 pulp - we love life
their third album in a row which accurately mirrors my current state of mind – is jarvis telepathic or what?

10 leonard cohen - ten new songs
simple language (and fewer jokes), but the songs are as complex as ever; allegedly his “dance album”!

11 herbert - bodily functions
if cherry red records had ever released jazzy deep house, it might have sounded like this – wet tuesday afternoon music which you can still twitch to.

12 daft punk – discovery
an album which I returned to at the end of the year, only to discover it sounded fresher than ever.

13 radiohead - amnesiac
“kid a” did it better, but this will do fine for now (I’m biased) – only could we have some more songs next time, please?

14 röyksopp - melody a.m.
in a sudden glut of chillout cds, this one stood out as having noticeably more rhythms, guts and ideas – my prediction for 2002’s slow burning word of mouth hit (like goldfrapp in 2001).

15 gotan project - la revancha del tango
accordion-led tango meets slinky electronica – dinner party cd of the year!

16 r.e.m. – reveal
I preferred them when they were being leftfield, but you can’t argue with accessible, commercial tunes like these.

17 missy elliott - miss e ..so addictive
can’t believe this is only #17, but it’s been an unusually strong year for albums – top 10 in any other year.

18 india.arie - acoustic soul
creamy classic soul with an acoustic leaning, like the lady says.

19 turin brakes - the optimist
on paper, everything I hate (travis meets del amitri meets crowded house), but somehow, it really works.

20 white stripes - white blood cells
great for when you’re doing the washing up late at night, pissed.

21 sunshine anderson - your woman
22 bjork - vespertine
23 playgroup - playgroup
24 avalanches - since i left you
25 mercury rev - all is dream

Delayed but played:
ryan adams – heartbreaker
lemon jelly – lemon jelly.ky
goldfrapp – felt mountain
slaid cleaves – broke down

Troubled Diva's Best Singles of 2001

1 missy elliott - get ur freak on
2 kylie minogue - can't get you out of my head
3 dandy warhols - bohemian like you
4 the ones - flawless
5 india.arie - video
6 charlatans - a man needs to be told
7 squarepusher - my red hot car (girl)
8 sunshine anderson - heard it all before
9 pulp - the trees / sunrise
10 ryan adams - new york, new york
11 andrew wk - party hard
12 new order - crystal
13 s club 7 - don't stop movin'
14 daft punk - digital love
15 basement jaxx - romeo
16 ben folds - rockin the suburbs
17 photek feat robert owens - mine to give
18 destiny's child - bootylicious
19 alicia keys - fallin'
20 aaliyah feat timbaland - we need a resolution
21 avalanches - since i left you
22 outkast - ms. jackson
23 roger sanchez - another chance
24 felix da housecat - silver screen shower scene
25 5ive - let’s dance
26 ben & jason - the wild things
27 super furry animals - (drawing) rings around the world
28 groove armada - my friend
29 super furry animals - juxtapozed with u
30 jakatta - american dream
31 jon cutler feat e-man - it's yours
32 basement jaxx - where's your head at
33 destiny's child - survivor
34 ash - shining light
35 britney spears - i'm a slave 4u
36 radiohead - knives out
37 ash - burn baby burn
38 r.e.m. - imitation of life
39 charlatans - love is the key
40 pj harvey - this is love

Regular readers please note: diary entry for December 25th now illustrated. Gasp!

Troubled Diva's Best Films of 2001

1. Memento
2. Together
3. Moulin Rouge
4. Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon
5. Shrek

Troubled Diva's Best Books of 2001

1. Last Night A DJ Saved My Life – Bill Brewster
2. The Rotters Club – Jonathan Coe
3. The Night Listener – Armistead Maupin

Troubled Diva's Best Gigs of 2001

1. Yes
2. Gong / Hawkwind
3. Madonna (twice!)
4. John Martyn
5. Goldfrapp
6. Super Furry Animals
7. Slaid Cleaves
8. Pulp
9. Air
10. Pernice Brothers
11. Ryan Adams
12. Gorkys Zygotic Mynci

A note to my regular readers (bless you all!)

The holiday diary has been updated from December 25th onwards.