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Wednesday, July 23, 2003
100 x 100. 57: Not that I've been watching it or anything. But... (part 1 of 4)
I'm annoyed with Scott.
For spending the last God knows how many weeks COMPLETELY suppressing EVERYTHING in his personality, with an ASTONISHING degree of self-restraint and skill, (except for that mild and really rather charming flirtation with Nush of course, (during which, in any case, he was a perfect gentleman who never once took a liberty)), ONLY to reveal, FINALLY, in the LAST FREAKIN WEEK ALREADY, that he is ACTUALLY, if you please, a perfectly decent and genuine and sorted and sussed and bugger me sideways, even quite (eek!) ARTICULATE and (erk!) INTELLIGENT and (aiee!) THOUGHTUL human being, with, y'know...
100 x 100. 56: Not that I've been watching it or anything. But... (part 2 of 4)
...OPINIONS an' shit, and not a semi-comatose sea-slug after all, which actually begins to explain (but only BEGINS to explain, mind) how he could POSSIBLY have written a (holy mother of GOD!) whole bleedin PLAY for RADIO FREAKIN 4, if you please, I mean HUH?, I mean WHAT?, I mean haven't you been wondering how that casually-slipped-by-Dermot-was-it? little infonuggetette could POSSIBLY compute with EVERYTHING you've witnessed from the guy up until now, or rather HAVEN'T witnessed, because he's been spending the last God-knows-how-many-weeks...
But yeah, if I HAD to vote for someone OR I DIE, then I'd vote for Scott.
100 x 100. 55: Not that I've been watching it or anything. But... (part 3 of 4)
Also.
I loved watching Cameron's squirming, wriggling reaction, when asked to give his views on gay relationships.
It said:
Shite. Shite. ShiteshiteBOLLOCKS. If I answer this question truthfully, then I will be throwing away any chance I ever had of winning this game. All those WEEKS of suppressing my opinions, of biting my lip, of trying to fit in without selling myself out - all come to NOUGHT because of this ONE wee question. OK. Let's see. Do I have to say what I really think? Or can I wriggle out of it somehow? Is there any way? Can't I...
100 x 100. 54: Not that I've been watching it or anything. But... (part 4 of 4)
...just equivocate, or fudge, or refuse to answer the question, or even - now here's a thought - downright LIE? Och nooooo. Ah cannae. Ah just cannae. For if I do, then my Baptist community will ostracise me when I’m back in the Orkneys, and then I'll be cast into eternal damnation in the afterlife. So either I can win the contest and BURRRRN, BURRRRN IN THE FIRES OF HELL, or I can admit that I think that homosexuality is a vile abomination before the sight of the Lord, and – och NOOOOO! - kiss goodbye to winning the contest. Shiteshiteshiteshiteshite-sorry-oh-lord-but- shite.
Tuesday, July 22, 2003
100 x 100. 53: Points arising.
On I Love Music, people have been nominating their favourite singles of 2003 to date. Here are the first 300 suggestions, in a handy little text file. No, I haven't heard of most of them either.
Alternatively, you can browse through my own top thirty, complete with an exciting three-way tie for first position.
not.so.soft might have been laid to rest, but it's good to see Meg blogging once again - now at me(ish) dot org: a digital approximation.
K and I have tickets to see the Gotan Project at Somerset House (London) on Friday August 8th. Is anybody else going?
100 x 100. 52: See below (part 1).
I was going to commemorate Post Number 50 in the 100 x 100 Project (for newcomers: this is a series of 100 posts containing exactly 100 words each) by linking to 50 interesting weblogs which I have never linked to before. (The word "interesting" is of prime importance here.)
Except that I gave up after 42, having reached a state of advanced Bloganthropy:
Sorry I haven't posted for…SHADDAP!
Woo! I've just bought the new Psion…SHADDAP!
There are many questions to be answered about the David Kelly…SHADDAP!
Why won't Blogger let me…SHADDAP!
Did you know that if you go to Google…
100 x 100. 51: See below (part 2).
…and type in "Weapons Of…SHADDDAPPP!!!!
In the old days, when I was young and lean and hungry and passionate and shit, I would have sat there, diligently slogging away until I had found the full fifty. But I have long since moved into my Fat Elvis / Be Here Now / will-this-do? / why-the-f**k-should-I-care? phase. So, sod it: here are 42 interesting weblogs, awaiting your discovery. Promise me you’ll randomly click on at least three of them.
And do please feel free to help me fill in the missing eight. Hey, why should I do all the work around here?
100 x 100. 50: 50 42 interesting weblogs which I haven't linked to before.
you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and you and, er, you.
100 x 100. 49: Garden pics.
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